October 31, 2014

OPINION: Tweeple don’t need RSS feeds for news

Rhonda Humble

Guest Columnist

There’s not room in my head for anything else.

I think I have reached the tipping point where I’m becoming resistant to change. I’ve just learned to program my VCR, and now I’m expected to wire up a Wii.

Now don’t get me wrong. I was doing pretty good at keeping up with the new lingo. LOL. CYU8R. my BFF.

I can spew alphabet soup with the best of them. But I’ve grown more cautious.

Technology that hides behind the alphabet is like a politican talking about doing what’s good for me – fickle and expensive.

Let’s face it; things designated only by alphabet are usually short-lived, like a BETA at Best Buy.

I should have known I was in trouble when I went to rent a movie, and all the VHS tapes at the store had been replaced by DVDs. Now the MovieGallery has been replaced by a payday loan, and I’m told I have to get my movies in the mail, or PPV (pay per view).

So the other day, when some youngster (30-something) told me I needed an RSS feed to help with my daily reading list, you can understand why I got a bit testy.

He said, I simply had to input my reading list into GOOGLE and my list of daily reading materials would pop up on my phone each day.

Why do I need some YAHOO to tell me what to read, I asked.

He smiled the smile that said, “poor old geezer,” and patiently explained how my list could show up on my phone once I programmed it.

I pushed my bifocals back up on my nose and explained to him – patiently I might add – that I enjoyed the feel of paper; it’s comforting to me.
Besides, why would I want my reading list on my phone where anyone could download it?

He looked disdainfully at the stack of rat-earred magazines and ripped out articles littering the floor around my desk. I could see the fervor of an organizational junkie twinkling in his eye, but I give him credit. He only told me that with an RSS feed I could share articles with others.

I handed him a two-year old magazine article I had highlighted.

“There you go,” I said. “I’m sharing.”

Then all the young folks ganged up on me. Talking about convenience, the future and the downfall of babyboomers.

What they don’t know is I’m a survivor. I’ve made it through Selectrics, 33s, 78s and 45s, 8-tracks, Hi-Fis, UHF, FAX, IBM, ATT and TTY.

A little RSS feed doesn’t frighten me.

They may tweet, but I can text. Let’s see who’s ROFLMBO when they get to be double nickles.

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